As Pato rides off towards other sunsets, other burdensome sinecures, it might be tempting to dismiss the entire episode as another note of bafflement in a rancourous, wasteful season. And yet there is something so odd here, so many associated force fields and interests it is probably worth unpicking a little. Pato: The Man Who Wasn’t There is a story without answers, or rather with only two possible answers, neither of which make much sense. In the words of the great George Costanza, this thing’s like an onion. The more layers you peel away, the more it stinks.
The first and most obviously incorrect interpretation is the one punted about by the kind of misguided conspiracy theorists who believe European football is overly influenced by agents shuffling players between clubs. With this in mind the person we should feel most sorry for here is Pato’s friend and aide, the oft-maligned Kia Joorabchian, who presumably believed in good faith that Pato was a purely footballing first-team prospect at Chelsea.
Barney Ronay on the strange case of Alexander Pato (Guardian)
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